Consternation

I just put Big Bee to bed - at a grand time of 11.45pm, despite the fact that tomorrow will be her first day in primary one (although thank goodness the school hours for the P1 kids in the first 3 days will be 8.30am to 12.30pm, just for adjustment's sake, whew!).

I prepared the 2 Bees to sleep at 9.30pm, one of the earliest in a long long time. Little Bee slept almost immediately, probably because she skipped her afternoon nap. Big Bee tossed and turned in bed, until I was quite mad at her, and went out of her bedroom for a cool-my-temper-down shower! She was very affected by this, and I felt pretty bad after my shower.

So, I plucked her out from her bedroom, sat her in the living room sofa, offered her a glass of warm water and a spoonful of rich, soothing, mellow honey, then proceeded to ask her why she could not sleep. (Normally, Big Bee will knock out to sleepy paradise less than 5 minutes after her head touches the pillow, so this is way malfunctional indeed!)

It seemed like this question from me was a mere catalyst for a floodgate of tears and frankness to flow out. With big drops of crystalline saltiness emanating from her eyes, she told me truthfully that she was very excited about tomorrow's first day in a primary school. She emptied her heart to me and shared her 3 biggest worries about tomorrow:
1) She is frightened of the form teacher whom we heard is rather fierce
- I assured her that form teachers, like her Selena in K2, are all firm and strict, but I heard from my friend who had been taught by the same teacher that she cares a lot for her students and is very good. She seemed comforted by this remark.

2) What if her P5 buddy is fierce?
- I giggled and made light of this worry, highlighting to her that her P5 buddy in another primary school during a K2 field trip was so super nice to her. I also related some stories from other girls who had been through P1 in the same school that the P5 buddy will be really nice and helpful. I asked her if she will be fierce to her P1 ward next time in P5...and she seemed tickled by this reversal of roles.

3) What if she has no friends?
- This is a very universal and understandable worry, something that Mummy always worried about when I was young too! How Big Bee resembles me! So, I told her that she usually had no problems socialising with new friends...assuring her that she already has a lot of friends, proof that she had been well-liked by peers usually.

Sigh. It pains my heart that my little girl had this whole burden on her shoulder as she steps across the threshold to a new chapter in her life. But I am confident that she is highly resilient and adaptable, and will be able to hold her head high amongst her peers and teachers.

I just hope she will not be too sleepy in school tomorrow!