The Road Not Taken

Robert Frost is one of my favourite poets, and I really love his evocative poems about nature, love and sorrow. He had an amazing power to convey the smallest nuances of reality through his concise but vivid writings.

Recently, I chanced upon this poem of his again (The Road Not Taken, as reflected below). As a mother, I thought long and hard about how I can convey this message to my children, how I should be imbuing in them the inspiration to do what they truly want, even if that would be unconventional and different from the others. I also thought about how this poem can inspire them not to be too easily influenced by peer pressure, especially with Big Bee embarking onto her tweenhood journey.

And most of all, I thought about what we should really be teaching our children in a stressful Singapore - to go with the flow of rigid studies based on rote-learning, or to listen to their hearts and excel in something they are good at? I guess the big question would be: Can we parents learn to accept the different roads our children may choose to take? How can we be sure that we will always be standing beside them, advocating them unconditionally, without putting any of our expectations on them?

These are tough questions as our children grow bigger, with more societal pressures on them. But I hope to be always inspired by my own mother, who had always advised me to follow my dreams and to pursue my passions. In an age when most parents preached professional degrees like Medicine and Law, I remember vividly the day that she told me to follow my heart when I was choosing between a law degree and a more broad-based communications and social sciences one. Most parents will nudge their children to a professional degree, but my own mother took a look at me and said, "I do not think a legal profession will be suitable for you, and I do not think you will be happy. Just choose what you are interested in." It was a bold and wise statement coming from a woman without much education, and it had remained indelible in my mind since then. And since then, I had never felt happier in my university journey and my various careers.

Will I be able to tell my children the same message when they come to the same crossroads?

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost

Colours Of Nature: The Virgin Forest

Virgin forest
Definition: A forest that had attained great age without significant disturbance, and thereby exhibits unique ecological features. Includes diversity of tree-related structures that serve as diversified wildlife habitat that leads to higher bio-diversity of the forested ecosystem.

Also known as: Primary forest, old-growth forest, primaeval forest, or in the UK, ancient woodland.

(Source: Wikipedia)

Sounds like nothing that we would encounter in Singapore? Well, one of our favourite to-do things over weekends would be to look for stretches of greenery in sweltering Singapore, and revel in the lush, verdant beauty. A tall order in blazing hot Singapore? Not surprisingly, nature reserves, forests and parks have one of the lowest temperatures due to the nurturing canopy of giant trees. So, even if we are trekking around under the mid-day sun, it will be cooler than walking around in the concrete jungle of Orchard Road!

The gorgeous forest canopy enveloped us from all perspectives

Which is why I love to immerse deep in the woods of Singapore. The smells of age-old trees and their leaves, the sounds of orchestras of unseen birds and insects chirping and shrilling away, the visual spectacle of endless verdure and minimal human traffic....all these are divine, to say the least.

We traipsed around the Bukit Timah Nature Reserve recently, in the Taban Loop of the Taban Valley, to be specific. It was just a hike almost in mid day, but one could never guess it was high noon from the cooling temperatures underneath that dense canopy. The Taban Valley is undulating, so there were plenty of really steep and high stairs built into the ground and lots of rustic forest paths. We deliberately avoided the masses of people thronging the main asphalt road just outside the woods, as we would rather have insects and trees as our companions when trekking. And true enough, many people avoided the more challenging forest walk, preferring instead to stroll in the comforts of the man-made roads outside.

We saw big spiders spinning intricate, colossal webs; we caught glimpses of amazing wildlife through the density of the foliage (we stood at a tiny rundown bridge on a tiny languid stream, enthralled by a rare rusty-brown bird bathing itself in the stream!); we listened to different calls of the wild and wondered what they are; we focused a lot on the narrow, rugged forest path to prevent ourselves from falling into the wooded valley below, and feasted our eyes on myriad plants.

According to the National Parks website, our nature reserves are home to more than 840 flowering plants and over 500 species of animals - and that the number of plant species growing in the Bukit Timah Nature Reserve alone is more than that in the whole of North America! And some of the trees in this forest are a few centuries old. How amazing is that...!

We completed the loop just under 1.5 hour, which was way too fast for Big Bee, who wanted to trek up to the summit. However, we had to consider poor Little Bee, whose short legs were so tired from scaling those numerous high steps cut into the ground!

Which means we will be back very soon, in a bid to climb to the top...

Love, Forever

They say the mind's memory archives fade with time. But they also say that the human heart remembers breathtaking moments in life, rather than specific, chronological days. For me, special moments are etched indelibly in my heart, in my soul - making some of these moments ineradicable in my mind.

I spent some time looking through some really old photos tonight, and these magnificent moments serve as a reminder for me to cherish every single day and to truly count my every blessing in life. For life is pretty marvellous indeed.

Big Bee at 4 years old, and Little Bee was barely 1 month old!

The girls in Arab Street 2 months back...

Of Felicity And Gatherings

One of the best things last month was that we managed to catch up with lots of family and friends for fun gatherings. The Bees are lucky in that they have lots of cousins and childhood friends to play with - other children who had stuck with them since babyhood, and who had grown up together with them. I thought this gives very special meanings to their first understandings of friendships - that friends grow and blossom together, and that - try as they should - friendships should really be all about long-term cultivation and sustenance.

We were lucky to have connected with our usual 3 groups of friends and families last month.

1) The Cousins
They had been hanging together since they were infants! Not only did the Bees have lots of girly cousins to play with (we need more little-boy cousins!), the grandmothers (all sisters!), who are usually chaperones of such gatherings, can use these beautiful opportunities for well-deserved gossiping and chatting!

We met up on the Thursday of the March school holidays at my house for a day-long of playing and swimming. Everyone was so reluctant to leave each other at the end of the long day!

2) PF and kids
These children literally grow up together from babyhood. Playing with baby toys like building blocks, bumbling baby gibberish together, exploring the world together and building sandcastles as pre-school kids, and now, as 3 of them are trundling into their teens, their idea of play is now playing chess and sitting around, chatting and gossiping. I am glad that the tiniest one amongst them - Little Bee - is being accepted wholeheartedly and is holding her weight very well with these big guns!

We had a great playdate on the last Friday of the March school holidays for a whole afternoon of Kinect and chilling between the girls. By evening, the hubbies as well as Eugene were back for a cosy steamboat dinner where the adults were busy chatting and eating on our dining table, whereas the 4 big kids ate rambunctiously and talked amongst themselves in another table! Talk about independence!

3) The Clique's kids (wow, it rhymes!)
The mothers (us!) had been very very good friends for 27 years. 27 YEARS!!! Oh my! And although our busy lives sometimes prevent our kids from meeting all that often, we still hope our kids will continue to hang out with each other until we are old, toothless grandmothers. I am glad that we are all meeting a little more frequently as our kids grow older.

On Good Friday, all of us trooped down to LP's house for a sumptuous dinner as well as fun and games for the kiddos. The adults had such a wonderful time catching up and gossiping, whereas all the kids (7 in total!) screamed, ran, chuckled and had a blasting great time in LP's house. We vowed to have more of such gatherings in future!

To The Zoo They Went

Little Bee had always relished field trips with schools since her pre-school days. When she first heard about the very first field trip to the zoo with her primary school, she was beside herself with excitement. I had never seen her more enthusiastic to attend school on the morning of her field trip!

I love the Bees' school for their beautiful balance of work and play. They are never too academically driven - and they make sure that their students have a very rich experience of student life activities and out-of-classroom programmes. In this age of crazy rote learning, with stressed out teachers attempting to churn out high-achieving but one-dimensional and somewhat robotic students with no passion for life, I think their school's approach to learning is very laudable and refreshing. And you could tell from the students - they are energetic, with a genuine love for the school, and they walk around in school with a spring to their steps and sparkles in their eyes.

Little Bee is also blessed with a wonderful form teacher who teaches them English and Math this year. She had been so supportive, nurturing and caring, albeit she is fresh from NIE. But that is perfectly fine. I had never seen a more devoted or committed teacher - not even with Big Bee's many teachers. She emails the parents all the time, and replies to our individual emails. She also maintains the class blog regularly, and takes photos of the students in all the various activities consistently - before posting these up to the blog almost every week. I feel totally blessed to meet with a dedicated teacher like her.

Little Bee came back from the zoo trip, rejuvenated and happy, of course. The following day, she wrote a little diary entry about her trip....